Love is Looking For You

"Maybe you're just jaded from some nobody's unforgotten words / Maybe you're just faded, a little gray from every time that you've been hurt / So you're lookin for your skin that you never did fit in / You can't hide when you're turned inside out / Love is looking for you now"  -Miranda Lambert

Love, sweet love.  I avoid writing about it because it sounds cliché and pouring out my heart on the Internet doesn't seem like the best decision for me, the men in my past, present and future, or future job opportunities.

Today, however, I was reminded of a great idea by a simple post on a friend's blog.  The entry stated: "The world would be a different place if every man knew that he has what it takes and every woman knew that she is worth it."

Truth, people!  Simple truth.  

It seems that so many men these days falter when it comes to taking simple action.  All it takes is a question: "Would you like to go on a date with me?"  (Please note that this does not mean Ruth's Chris or $100 symphony tickets.  It could delightfully mean a picnic or a free concert -- c'mon, we live in the Nash.)  Rejection is scary, I know.  But if you never, ever ask, you're never going to get rejected, sure, but you're also never going to get a date!  Take the risk.  The worst she can say is no, which means there is someone better.  The best she can say is yes and then you get to hang out with a super cool girl.  (Please also note I am speaking generally and not just about myself.  I'm not that vain.)

It also seems that women falter when it comes to evaluating their self-worth.  How many times have we asked ourselves, "Why is she with him?"  Or perhaps, on a more personal note, we've asked ourselves after breaking-up and cooling down, "What did I ever see in him?"  Women get caught up in flattery and often settle for attention when what they really want is companionship.  Deep down women want a true friend not just a lover.  But so many women don't think they're worth waiting for -- and I'm not just talking about sex.  I'm talking about finding the guy who really does complement you.  A guy who makes you laugh, holds the door, treats you with respect and dignity in conversation and in front of his friends.  A guy who wants you to meet his family, wants to listen to your dreams and wants to help you achieve them.  Women deserve that.

Two great Christian examples?  St. Joseph and Mary.  St. Joseph had to take an unwed pregnant woman as his wife and travel all over the place with her.  Talk about a challenge.  But did he ever rise to it!  St. Joseph buckled down and trusted in God that he had what it took to survive the pregnancy scandal, care for Mary and then care for Jesus too!  Courage, bravery, dedication, leadership, hard work -- Very manly qualities!  St. Joseph shows men that they can "have what it takes" in the face of adversity, no matter how big or small.  Mary was entrusted with bearing the Son of God.  Even though she probably asked herself, "Really, God chose me?" she responded in trust and confidence proclaiming that she was the handmaid of the Lord -- That God had made her worthy to accomplish His will.  So God makes all women beautiful and worthy to accomplish His will for their lives.

We've all been hurt, been "jaded" like Miranda Lambert sings, but we can rise above it.  Men -- You can step up and be true men.  You can not only ask a woman out on a date, but you can provide for her, you can protect her, you can be gentle and strong.  You can.  Women -- You're worth so much more than precious stones.  You have inherent dignity and beauty, and you deserve a man who will treat you as a daughter of God.  In return, you must remember to treat your man as a son of God.  Remind him often that he can do it!  And his actions and words should always say to you that you're worth it.

Sure, it involves risk, but what doesn't?  Doesn't that risk, that vulnerability, make it more worth it in the end?

Love is looking for each of us.  Most of us have an earthly companion -- husband or wife -- waiting for us.  But in the bigger scheme of things, Love -- God -- is forever looking for us, always searching for our hearts and drawing us closer to Himself.  Let's not forget that, for it is perhaps the biggest risk of all that we take -- Being vulnerable with God.  We're supposed to give everything -- not just a lot -- to Him.  And He will give everything back.

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless -- it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.” -CS Lewis